Lately, I've been having dreams that I'm interpreting to have this idea of freedom. They're interesting.

Ok, so in the dream I had Thursday night I was in The Gulf of Mexico floating around with people (I didn't recognize any of them). Suddenly, I see dolphins floating around me. One then begins to push me quickly around the water on it's nose. It felt amazing. I guess this has a theme of freedom since I've heard (or I think I've heard) people say that when they're swimming with dolphins that they felt free.

In the dream I had last night I was in this canyon type place. There was a river/stream-thing going through it and the canyon walls had vegetation growing around it. There were some people there that I actually knew, but I never really talked with them much. I have no clue as to why they were there. Anyway, so I was there with them and we were hiking around and such. It felt really good. It was calming.

I was thinking about the reasoning behind me having these dreams, and I've come up with a theory. Ever since I've told Lain about my love for him, I guess I've felt more free. Maybe what I've done has given me the idea that if I can do what I just did then I can do anything. Not a lot of people that I know have done what I did so maybe that's why in my subconscious I feel free.

Speaking of Lain, I can't help but always think about what must be/must have been going through his mind now that he knows. I wish he would talk to me about it. I can't really explain this desire either. Maybe it's because I have this mindset that if you talk it out then it makes things so much better. It can also free that idea from your mind. Also, it's because it would make me feel better since, by nature, I want to talk to him. But, when I do talk to him, I don't want to make it all awkward and stuff. I think I'm asking for too much.

This is a little irrelevant, but it has recently bugged me so I might as well let it out. Remember Andy? Well, he gets on my nerves extremely badly. He is so arrogant it drives me nuts. Everything has to be about him. He doesn't care about anyone else but himself. So, what has put me off the deep end? Well, I suggested a trip to the movies with my little close-knit group of friends, and I suggested that we invite other people besides ourselves so that it would be more fun. Well, guess who didn't like that idea. Yay for AIM logs!

[18:49] Andy: no inviting random band ppl to movies
[18:49] I: why are you on the computer?
[18:49] I: also, why not?
[18:50] A: i'm on the computer cuz i'm not gonna play games
[18:51] A: and also
[18:51] A: y?
[18:51] A: it's stupid
[18:51] A: i don't wanna see band ppl during my break
[18:51] I: what about the other people
[18:51] A: like who?
[18:52] I: [names of other people in my close-knit group of friends]
[18:52] I: they might want other people to come
[18:52] A: i don't care
[18:52] A: if u wanna go w/ other ppl
[18:52] A: do it at ur own time
[18:52] I: ok
[18:52] I: well
[18:52] I: if you hate band people so much
[18:52] A: ok well
[18:52] I: you don't have to go
[18:52] A: i don't care
[18:52] A: i'm going to see my friends
[18:53] A: don't be a bitch
[18:53] I: ....
[18:53] A: who else in band would u invite?
[18:53] I: people in the flute secton
[18:53] A: no
[18:53] A: u can have a flute section outing some other time
[18:54] I: ...
[18:54] I: is it really that bad of a thing?
[18:54] A: u know wat
[18:54] A: i have a better idea
[18:54] I: if you want to be anti-social about this you can just not go
[18:54] A: i'm already pissed off enough today, if u gonna be a bitch, fine, keep on doing it, bye
[18:54] *** "A" signed off at Sat Dec 22 18:54:47 2007.