Ok, so today was the last day of the fall semester. It didn't really sink in to me. I've been so caught up in Lain and everything that it just wasn't of importance to me. I'm kinda sad that school is over until the 7th since I like seeing my friends at school. I'll be really bored sitting at home doing nothing. I'll have to take up a hobby or something.

So, this morning I saw Lain today. It was weird. So, this is how it all "went down". When the bell rang to go to class I went to my English class to get my final exam grade (I got an 86). I got that done so I went to walk toward my Chinese class. I was walking down the hallway toward the stairs when I see Lain come into the school from one of the doors near the stairs. He sees me and says "Hey". I almost freaked. I might be over exaggerating on this, but when I saw him, I had this nervous feeling and when he actually said something to me I was like "O_O" in my head. I don't even know if we were that close. Everything looked warped almost (maybe that was because my contacts were messed up because I was sleeping for an hour before I got to school). I said "Hi" back, of course. Who knows if he heard it.

An update on the Facebook message. I forgot to note that Lain barely gets on Facebook. He averages one log-on per 2 days. I sent it pretty late yesterday. It doesn't seem like he'll get on today so I'll have to wait for a response tomorrow. Hopefully, that message I sent him will help speed up the process, so to speak, of the awkward-ness going away. It'll take some time for it to wane though. That's probably why I told him before a long break- so that he'll have time to think about it alone. Although, that does have a disadvantage since I want to see his reaction right away and not have to wait ~2 weeks for it. I'm impatient. <_< So, hopefully, Lain will respond tomorrow and I'll be able to deal with that without the stress of final exams. Oh, by the way, I got either a 91 or a 92 on my Chinese final. Whoo!

http://thoughtsinwine.cbox.ws/
I set that up a few days ago. If any of y'all want to talk to me there, then you can. I find it easier to reply to things on there than to reply using a comment. So, bookmark it or whatever if you're interested.

 Yep. I'm going to do it alright. I'm going to tell Lain that I like him tomorrow. I don't even know why I'm doing it either. I guess it's because I'm tired of waiting around. I'm tired of not being the one to take the initiative. I'm tired of complaining without having done anything. Earlier today when I got home at around 1:30, I was pretty much freaking out about it. I was so nervous and scared. I had the same feeling I had whenever I get in line for rollercoasters.  Right now, I don't have that feeling. It's kinda worrying me. I guess all of this over confidence of Lain being accepting of the fact that a guy likes him is getting to me. I'm not even expecting much from this anyway. What I think will happen is that I'll tell him and then he'll be like "No, sorry" but he'll still not be as weirded out. That scenario is fine with me. As long as we still talk and stuff just a little less since I can understand that he'll be afraid of me coming on to him. What I really don't want to happen is that he just absolutely hates me for liking him and such and then proceeds to go and tell others of this and I become the talk of the band for being bisexual. What would be a miracle is Lain saying yes and we become a happy couple. :D

I'm pretty much in the dark about what might happen so we'll just have to wait and see. I hope I don't chicken out.

Finals update: I took the US History and English ones today. They were pretty easy. I might've messed up on the English final a little but it won't cost me that many points. Who knows.

Before I start. Thanks for comments. They're fun to read. Also, I had some finals today. I took my German and Physics final. Both of them were pretty hard. The German one was practically all true or false which really tripped me up. Physics was just plain ol' hard. I hope I didn't fail that one.

So, I'm beginning to understand why Tren has started to ignore me. I will use wonderful AIM logs to explain this. Note: My friend, he'll be called Andy, told he in English class a few days ago that he figured out why Tren was ignoring me, so... this is how it begins.

[20:05] I: ok, so why is [tren] ignoring me?
[20:06] Andy: ok, remember that note some1 wrote to [nick]? (Note: Nick is the person who Andy likes)
[20:06] I: yea
[20:06] A: well
[20:06] A: i'm won't tell u who wrote it (i found out btw)
[20:06] A: so apparently
[20:06] A: that person
[20:06] A: talks to [tren]
[20:06] A: and told him something along the lines of
[20:06] A: "stay away from [me] and [andy], they r gay"
[20:07] I: and why can't i know who this person is?
[20:07] A: it's my business....
[20:07] I: it's kinda my business too since that person revealed half of my sexuality to [tren]
[20:07] I: <_<
[20:10] A: w/e
[20:11] I: >_>
[20:12] I: well, i wanna know
[20:12] I: but, oh well
[20:13] A: well u can't know
[20:13] I: ok
[20:16] I: at least he isn't verbal of his "homophobic-ness"
[20:17] I: wait....
[20:17] I: how is this your fault?
[20:17] I: and why do they know i'm "gay"?
[20:20] A: they don't
[20:20] A: but
[20:20] A: they know i'm gay
[20:20] A: and since u associate with me
[20:20] I: oh
[20:20] I: that's stupid
[20:21] A: well it's true
[20:21] I: i'm not gay because you're gay ,_<
[20:21] A: because i caught them talking after 6th period today (Note: 6th period is band. It's so funny how everything happens in band)
[20:21] A: and i heard
[20:21] A: "[me] and [andy] r gay lovers"
[20:21] A: then they saw me
[20:21] A: and shut up
Self-explanatory right there.

Also, I now understand why Crystal is a little jealous of me for liking Lain. Ok, so, around last year I'm guessing (she didn't tell me when) she liked this guy named Brad. Brad looks pretty similar to Lain except that Brad is way taller than Lain so naturally she would at least feel something toward Lain. She tells me that it's a "fondness" but I know she won't tell me the complete truth. Speaking of Lain, he was "flirting" (seemed like it to me but it just might be wishful thinking) with me during our break in between finals. The most remarkable thing that he was doing was that he took my Physics review packet away from me and stuck it near the garbage. <_<

I uploaded an album for a friend so I might as well share it on here. If Russian indie rock is your thing then you must have this.
In Verse - demo
http://www.mediafire.com/?fb9guqjntlw